A few deep thoughts
12:12 AM

Do you ever get smacked in the face with the person you used to be?

We all change. We all evolve, adapt, and move onward and upward and away from things that in their moment were the most important things in your life, until the next most important thing shows up. Some of these important things stay with you, and some don't make the cut. And tonight it hit me: I left a few things behind that I really should have packed in my life pocket.

This has got to be one of my favourite photos I've ever taken. It's the result of planning, determination, and a few frozen butts in the middle of November. Hard work, baby. But back then, I had vision. I had drive. What I left behind when I finished school and transitioned to real life? My spark.

It's hard to transition to being a real live grownup (really, I'm still a toddler with chocolate on her face, but don't tell anyone) after living as a student with boundless dreams and ideas surrounding your every move. Suddenly it's all about making it work: money, love, life, happiness, and suddenly... things fall through the cracks. I'm unhappy to announce that I've lost myself! Or, to be specific, a few pieces of myself that I'd love to restore: my drive, my spark, and my love of creative photography.

Don't get me wrong. I've been a photographer since those carefree days! I've been fairly successful with my wedding, family, and portrait work that has kept me on my toes for the mostpart. But tonight it hit me: I've lost the reason why I dove into this crazy profession in the first place! My inspiration for the crazy, creative, intoxicating and delicious, the wonderful passion for editorial and fashion that I used to love. 

 A pretty solid example of what I haven't kept up with: surrounding myself with inspiration. Tim Walker has the distinct privilege of having his own folder on my harddrive just for his ridiculously inspiring images. The last time I looked at them? 2010. Years. This has become an issue!

The reason for this rant is most definitely sparked by a recent interview with the wonderful Lara Jade. Meeting her and having the amazing opportunity to take her workshop has got to be one of the most ridiculously awesome experiences of my life to date, and I've gotta say that her work ethic and drive has been a constant inspiration pushing me to rediscover why it is that I love creative imagery. Check out the interview, go look at her body of work, and prepare to be inspired.

The bottom line of this crazy long-winded rant? Remind yourself of who you used to be. What you used to love. What used to make you tick. Because times change, and people change with them. With what I've gained, I've had equal losses and need to push to regain the ground I had once covered. INSPIRE YOURSELF TO DO MORE. And look back to when you can truly say you were in the thick of it: young, ambitious, and dream-driven. Get some of that back, and run like the wind.


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